How well do we absorb and strengthen from failure?

The medallions of our failures nestle closely to us through the seasons. Whether slight, or solid, invisible or gleaming, these battle trophies remind us of lessons learned, fruitless journeys and tangential epiphanies.

I grew up in a time and place when failure attached itself to you, finding its way into the sense of self, as well as inconveniently into the hands of naysayers. Times have changed, and over the years, I’ve realized that I remain one of my most severe critics, ready to drag myself into hiding and self-recrimination. I too often forget that other business builders only focus on their own journey. A lot of commentary seems to emanate from  gatekeepers and critics who aren’t often building anything themselves.

I was envious of others able to transform the tales of their own failings into achievement. And resentful of those who got an ‘unfair’ break over others in the same boat. But given that most of the world’s population is on the wrong side of Warren Buffet’s ‘Genetic Lottery’, being envious or jealous doesn’t make sense. The energies are better spent trying to make a difference. Hard to remember when the world is whizzing by and you’re waiting for your bus!

I still recall something a lead character in one of my favourite tv shows in grad school: Captain Picard of the Enterprise saying at the end of a failed mission something along the following lines: “sometimes it is possible to follow protocol and still lose. That is life, that is the universe”. I wish that wasn’t true.

In our last start-up, we certainly didn’t breeze through, so I can’t sum up our journey with poetic sadness. We made our share of wrong turns. And we did a few things right, adding depth to the shallow, in some cases, even proving people much smarter than us, wrong. But in the end, we weren’t able reach product/market fit faster than others could raise capital and muddy the waters. Product-market proximity, but not fit. Certainly not the magical connection where the product sells itself (and your customers do the rest and put you in the low CAC and high CLV zone)!

I’ll follow up with a couple of posts breaking down some of the lessons learned. And before resetting and building anew, stay for a fireside chat with failure a bit longer…